Intimacy in a Cookie Jar? Intimacy and Relationships

We all feel it…the pull and push of the daily grind. Taking care of the house, the kids, the pets, the yard, managing our work life, making time for friends, paying the bills, and calculating how to juggle your time when stressors just seem to leap onto your calendar out of nowhere.  In the middle of so many things taking up so much brain space, it can be hard to even keep at the forefront what your spouse or partner needs, or even what you need in the relationship!  Not to mention finding time to have fun! Sometimes intimacy and relationships just don't seem to blend well when there is so much happening in daily living. If you are struggling to manage your time and memory in regards to cultivating meaningful moments in your relationship, here is a relationship tip that you and your spouse or partner can use to rekindle care, surprise and intimacy...let me introduce you to 'Intimacy in a Cookie Jar.'

1. You will need three cookie jars.  One jar is for you, one is for your spouse or partner, and the other is for the both of you.  

2. In your jar write down on slips of paper different things you would love your spouse or partner to do for you. In your spouse or partner's jar they can write down on slips of paper what they would like you to do for them. In your ‘together’ jar, together you both will come up with several fun ways you’d like to spend time with each other and put them in this jar. 

3. Each week you can pick one slip from your spouses’ jar and do that item for them at any point in the week. Each week your spouse can pick a slip from your jar and do that item for you at any point in the week. Each week you and your spouse or partner can pick a slip from the ‘together’ jar and plan to do that date idea together. 

This can be fun and meaningful for couples since it helps bring surprising thoughtfulness back into the relationship, while also eliminating the guesswork of what you or your spouse/partner needs in order to feel thought of, important, cared for, heard, and connected. Have fun picking out your cookie jars and making this your own!

If you need help reviving connection, fun and love in your marriage or relationship, I would be more than happy to help you on your journey towards restoration through marriage and couples counseling. Feel free to contact me by phone (860-791-4688), by email (elizabeth@plumeriacounseling.hush.com), or by booking a free 15 minute consultation.